*Yawn* Ashton Kutcher and CNN had a battle of the tweets to see who’ll be the first to reach 1 million followers on Twitter. After edging out CNN for the attention whore tiara, Kutcher went on Larry King to talk about Twitter.

With tears of joy dripping down his cheeks, Ashton Kutcher expressed his excitement over the online douchebaggery victory. “We now live in an age in media that a single voice can have as much power and relevance on the Web, that is, as an entire media network,” he said. “And I think that to me was shocking.”

Eh, I’d be more impressed if one person who wasn’t already famous reached a million followers.